Love and Marriage

So David got married. haha, that's weird to write. My amazing, man of God brother is married to the most amazing woman of God, Meredith. It was such a great wedding, and I have never seen David so happy.

The Colorado people started invading Dallas, Texas on about Thursday, Sept. 10th. It was so awesome getting ready for the wedding in every way possible. Programs, ribbions to cut, nails to be done, parties to go to, and laughs to be shared. It was like everyone had been injected with joy and giggles and we were all high on the David and Meredith love bug. :)

Finally on the day of the wedding after everything was in place, the ceremony commenced. Now, this is the first wedding I have been to since I have not just known about my Savior, but loved Him. So, I asked God to show me Him in this wedding. The bridal party has entered, the candles have been lit, David is standing taking deep breaths, and is waiting for his bride to enter. The doors open and it was if for a moment everyone held their breath. I glance back at my brother, and tears are streaming down his face. He bites his lip to try and hold back a gasp. Now, David is no cry baby. I have never seen him cry like that before and I don't know if I ever will again. Every step she took closer to him another tear fell. It was one of the most beautiful moments I have ever seen.

God whispered to me, "I can't wait to see you face to face one day." It caught me so off guard. Wow. If this is how my fallen brother feels about a fallen bride, how much more does Jesus long for us, His bride to enter into His courts. If tears streamed down David's face...will they stream down my Jesus' face when He sees me? We sang "Be Thou My Vision" and as I sang, "Thou and Thou only, first in my heart." I had to choke back my tears.

I listened to a sermon the other day and the pastor said, "Christians don't tell lies, they sing them." Those words rang so loud in my ears as I sang that, because how many times has He not been the only thing on the throne of our hearts. School, work, guys, vanity, pride, church, friendships, just junk. How often to we dethrone our Jesus to replace Him with something that pales in comparison.

The beauty of all of this is that divorce is not an option. Divorce for David and Meredith is not an option. Divorce for Jesus and us is not an option. We arrived at the final verse of the song and sang, "Heart of my own heart, whatever befall..." Whatever happens you have my heart, and I have Yours and that will never change. No matter how many times we "cheat" on Him, divorce is not an option.

David and Mere love each other in a way that I have never seen before. They are destined for each other. They are so amazing together. They are better together than apart. Now, replace the names David and Mere in that sentence with Jesus and your name. I pray and beg people say that about my Savior and me. Jesus and Becca love each other in a way that I have never seen before. They are destined for each other. They are so amazing together. They are better together than apart...

"Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart..."

The Heart of the Matter

Getting ready for bed is always enjoyable for me for some reason. Brushing my teeth, getting into some sweat pants and an over sized t-shirt, and finally crawling under the covers is just blissful. Proly because I'm so dang tired at night now, but the last few nights the same thing keeps happening... Have you ever laid your head down on your pillow and you can hear the blood pumping in your ear? Like, you can literally hear and feel your heart beating. That happens to me a lot and usually, I just roll over and resituate. The last few nights, however, I have just sat for awhile and listened to it, and thought, "Oh my gosh, that's amazing."

Did you know that your heart beats about 100,000 times in one day?!

Your body has 6 liters of blood and pumps it ALL through the body three times every minute.

In a single day, the blood travels 12,000 miles. That's the distance of the US, coast to coast....four times.

And usually I just roll over to sleep when I hear that sweet, miracle of a noise.

That noise can really keep you awake I discovered. So, I started to think about how I feel like God is always whispering to me how much He loves me in the tiny ways. Maybe that noise, is way more than just a noise. I think...no I KNOW that's God telling me he is pumping my blood, that He is making my heart beat, and that He loves me.

So, as this thought process is going on in my head, I start to think even more. I finally end up thinking about how amazing the heart is, and contemplate what a crucial part of the body it is... and literally this is what I thought, "Holy crap...the heart is pivotal to the body! God you SO did that on purpose! You TOTALLY made it that way intentionally!

Haha, how did I miss it. God made the physical heart so important and so vital, to show us how the spiritual heart is even more essential. Just as a body without a healthy heart is on its way to to death, so are we without a spiritually strong heart. So, then my mind races to all the parallels of a physical vs. a spiritual heart.

How hearing that you have a "heart" problem is such a devastating phrase to hear. Both physically and spiritually. How we all want a strong and healthy heart. Protect your heart. What's the heart of the matter. His heart stopped beating.

Then I started thinking about my life. About my heart. I feel like my heart is strong and healthy. Why? Suddenly, it hit me..... Heart transplant. Now, maybe you have already thought about these things and you are getting bored, but sorry, I haven't. I mean, we all know that God is in creation. God is mighty because of the mighty mountains, God is powerful like the storm, warm like the sun, etc. But we are talking about blood and an organ here. Not a cute shaped heart like little girls love to draw. We are talking a nasty mass of tissue.

I was dying of heart failure. I needed a donor. Did you know that 550,000 people are newly diagnosed with congestive heart failure in the US every year. Over 300,000 people die from it each year, while others are still fighting to survive... waiting for a donor. Only 2,210 heart transplants happen in a year on average in the US. There aren't enough donors...physical donors.

This is the part in my mind that goes like this. The doctor walks into the waiting room, as my mom and dad stand up in anticipation. It's been a long, hard battle. "Miss Billingslea, I have great news. We found a donor..."

Ezekiel 36:26, "I will give you a new heart..."

Lay in bed tonight.

Set your head down.

Listen to the beating of your heart.

And you thank God for giving you a donor.